Eunice's Story

The following story of Eunice has been written by her husband Adrian.  It shows the journey Eunice and her family took with the assistance of the holistic care provided by Hospice in the Weald.

 

Eunice Carlton was born 11^th June 1960; she was diagnosed with scoliosis at the age of eleven.  She fought all her teenage years, as well as all her adult years too, with pain.

She underwent several operations throughout her adult life.  Her last operation for corrective surgery for scoliosis was on 14^th February 2013, where she underwent two operations to insert two plates either side of her spine and then connect them together with screws through her vertebrae.

It was while she was recovering from this, that she became jaundice, she was admitted to Pembury Hospital, where we were told that she had got liver and pancreatic cancer, and that she had only a few months at best.

Eunice was rushed up to University College Hospital, where they attempted to insert stents from the liver to the pancreas; it was eventually achieved after a fourth operation.

Eunice came home for three weeks after her diagnoses (1^st July 2013). It was then that we were first contacted by the Hospice in the Weald. They came out the next day and we were obviously distressed at the news that she hadn’t long, but also that a Hospice were quick to get to see her.

But when the hospice nurse came, she almost immediately put our minds at rest that they were here to help both Eunice and the family in whatever way they can.

They got to work in organising any benefits or grants and equipment that would help Eunice cope and have some control at home i.e.; Hospital bed, mattress, recliner chair and rails to help her keep her independence. They also helped with benefit forms for myself, as I had worked all my life and never claimed before and I was now a full time carer. They also offered a place at the Hospice Day Service on a Wednesday.  Eunice was scared, people with cancer in a cancer Hospice, what a depressing place to be, and she also didn’t want reminding of her terminal illness.

How so very wrong our conception was of the Day Service. I dropped her off and she was feeling very scared but it was a different person I picked up. She was so happy she didn’t want the day to end, she had, had a very good day.

After that, no matter how ill she was, she would do her best to go. She loved Wednesdays coming round.

The Hospice nurses and staff were not the doom and gloom you would expect, but they were helpful and jolly, they always had a smile and a kind word for you.  Eunice had a councillor to chat to about her fears and worries.  We had a regular visits from Tracy and Kerry (Hospice nurses) at home to see how she was.

We obviously had to face the inevitable question of death and where Eunice wanted to be. Eunice chose the Hospice In Patient Unit as we had a twelve-year-old boy, Kyle, and Eunice was reassured that they would make it happen, as it was possible.

Eunice started making a bucket list, one was to get married, which we did on the 13^th September 2013, Nell (Creative Artist) from the Hospice had an idea of a tree of life, where guests would put their finger print on a canvas on which Nell had drawn a tree. I hang this in my front room as a happy reminder.

Kerry (Advanced Practitioner and Head of Hospice Day Service) contacted us soon after to let us know that she had been contacted by the “Air-Smiles” company to see if we would like a flight in a light aircraft and stay in the George Hotel, in Cranbrook. What a gift it was, we loved it so much, we had photos taken and were treated like royalty.

Eunice had a few infections during her illness, and at every step of the way, the Hospice was helping me cope, with their support and kind words,

Eunice was afraid of dying in Hospital, so when the Hospice had a bed, Eunice would be offered it. She was frightened of the Hospital but when she knew she was going to the Hospice calm would descend on her it really felt like a home from home.

When Eunice was in the Hospice the nurses would chat to the early hours if necessary as Eunice was suffering with panic attacks, they were wonderful. I could stay until I wanted to go home or even stay all night, there were no visiting hours. I could stay how long or how little I wanted to.

Eunice became very ill at home on Christmas night, she was advised to contact a doctor, but she refused as the doctor would just send her to Hospital so Kerry from the Hospice, organised a bed for Eunice on the 27^th December 2013.  When she was taken to the Hospice and she was much happier in herself.

We were offered a family room so that we could be with her all the time and they fed us as well as Eunice. On New Year night I bought some buffet food in and as a family we saw the New Year in with Eunice.

Eunice died in the Hospice on 26^th January 2014.

The Nurses, doctors and all the staff were wonderful, supportive and helpful to us all as well as my beautiful wife Eunice.

I do believe Eunice wouldn’t have lasted as long if it wasn’t for the medical, emotional and spiritual help from the Hospice in the Weald, it is a marvellous place where the fear of terminal illness seems to fade a little. Eunice had fought most of her life with illness and pain, but the Hospice helped. Eunice was at peace right to the end with me by her side.

The Hospice haven’t washed there hands of our family since Eunice has gone, they are still supporting me and our family even now.  THE HELP SUPPORT CONTINUES UNTIL  IT  ISN’T REQUIRED ANYMORE.  Thank you Hospice in the Weald from the bottom of hearts

Love

Eunice, Adrian, Kyle, Chris, Paul, all of our parents, brothers and sisters.